The End Of My Story...

My story Part One
My story Part Two
My story Part Three



Many times over the course of the next few weeks, I couldn’t help but stop and wonder what it was that I had done wrong in my life. What was it that I had failed to do that caused my marriage to come to an end in such a short amount of time? I was haunted by it for weeks. Then one day, I figured it out. Nothing. I had done absolutely nothing wrong, whatsoever. None of this had anything to do with what kind of wife I was or what sort of mother that I am. This was all the workings of another person, and it was totally out of my control.

To this day, I swear that the anti-depressant, Lexapro, saved my life. Without it I would never have gotten through the next few months. That, combined with the help of my children, my family and my friends. Nobody could get over how well I was doing and how far I had come despite my troubles. I felt like a new person.

So as it goes, my life went on. I made new friends, I changed my attitude about so many different things, I came out of my shell and lived again. I found that I was actually happier now than I had ever been, even when I was married. I discovered things about my husband and my marriage that were all wrong, and despite the fact that I always thought we had a great life and everything was wonderful, in actuality, it was not.

I would never have left my husband. I was in this marriage for better or for worse and such is how it should be. All of the promises I had made were to be kept and I will always know in my heart that what I did what was right. I loved with all that I had and did everything I had to do to make our lives as happy as possible. Sometimes your best is not enough for some. So be it.
It has been almost two years since all of this has happened. My ex husband is no longer with the woman that he left me to pursue a relationship with. For that I am grateful, because I did not like for my girls to be in that particular situation. As far as I know, it was not a healthy environment or relationship.

C and I get along now as well as can be expected. I think that some of our friends and family actually think our situation now is a strange one. However, I no longer have any (or many) hard feelings towards him. Granted, I did go through one of the most awful things anyone could imagine. I just realized that no matter what, life goes on and it can only get better.

I could not have asked for a better father for my children. Although we didn’t work out as a married couple, we do very well in the co-parenting department. In our divorce, we agreed on just about everything and that made the transition much easier for all of us. I still live in the home that we had together, so my girls have that comfort of the home they’ve known all along. They do miss their dad horribly. Not for the fact that they don’t see him, he gets them every other weekend and he does not live far from us. He also calls them every day and supports them well financially. It’s just hard for them not seeing him everyday like they normally would have.

I think that divorce is a terrible thing to face and I would not wish it on the most horrid of people. Nobody deserves to go through it, especially the children. I would never have dreamed of putting them through all of the drama that ensued, but they are thriving very well. Thankfully.

One day I will probably look back on all of this and see it as a learning experience. Something that only made me a stronger person. As for now, I still have moments and I am not quite as trusting of a person as I used to be. With time I know that my wounds will be completely healed and I will be a better person for it. Keeping a positive outlook on life is hard at times but I am working on it. I know that I deserve to be happy and I am.